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my crucifixion

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(drive a nail in)

[21 Oct 2005|04:00am]
I ain't no God damned son of a bitch. You better think about it baby.

(drive a nail in)

[13 Oct 2005|03:05pm]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | Fleetwood Mac - The Chain ]

I really do mean to update more often, but I'm forgetful. Whatever.

Here's an overview of the last week:

I went to the bar last Friday, and it was dumb. Amanda wouldn't dance because she didn't want people to be looking at us. What's the point of getting all ready and going out if nobody's going to see me? So I downed a few, and created my own fun. ;] Tomorrow I'm going again, and I'm bringing someone else to drive home.


As far as not procrastinating, HA. I'm an idiot, and waited until Tuesday yet again. But it's alright. We have but two more classes before our clinicals, during which I will be working with actual patients, and wearing my spiffy scrubs. Nicole and I purchased some from her mother's work. The pants are flared. Yeah, that's right. All the others will have standard, Wal-mart style scrubs. We'll be rockin' the good stuff. However, the uniform code dictates that we must wear white. I have to purchase some granny-syle white undies, as I do not own any. Bummer.


I'm sick, and that sucks.


Good news: Joe and I have been engaging in phone conversations every night for the past week. He's a spectacular person. Ab-fab.

(drive a nail in)

[07 Oct 2005|02:07pm]
[ mood | amused ]
[ music | The thin ice - Pink Floyd ]

Last night, Heather, Amanda, and I went to Kevin's house and jammed for a bit. It was fun. Watching him play the guitar makes me want to crack down and get serious about playing. He has so much talent, and he taught himself. I am amazed, because I can't teach myself shit. Lol

I'm going to a bar/club tonight with Amanda. She said that there are bunches of sexy men there, so we'll see. Sometimes her judgement is questionable. But everyone looks alright when I'm half in the bag. lol

It'll be cool, I'm sure. I could use a night of fun, and I fully intend to tear up the dance floor. I want everyone to be looking at me. ;] Haha

(drive a nail in)

"Dibs on Roger!" [05 Oct 2005|10:35pm]
[ mood | tired ]

I had class today. We learned about Perineal care. Exciting, eh? It was certainly someting. The syllabus indicated that we'd be giving eachother bed baths today, but we didn't. I was a little bummed about that...i shaved my legs this morning, and for what? haha. Instead, we demonstrated on some anatomically corect dummies. Not exactly CORRECT...they wee transexual dummies, sort of. The penis was dettachable, but both had breasts. The one that i demonstrated on had a bracelt that read, "Roger." That was funny to me. Anyway, I'm tired because I stayed up until nearly 6 AM doing homework that I should have been doing all week in preparation for today. I think I'll be turning in early tonight. But all is well, this week is a new week, and I don't intend to procrastinate. We'll see. Lol.

(drive a nail in)

If only I had an emotional switch. [04 Oct 2005|03:09am]
[ mood | empowered/pensive ]
[ music | Bad Religion - Sorrow ]

I had a dream about Mike the other night. I really wish I could stop thinking about him, but it seems to be inevitible. In the dream, he was in a bed of roses, but the roses were artificial, like those purchased at a craft store. I perceived this to be artificial beauty. Perhaps it meant that what we had was not real, but in fact artificial. Maybe this is the closure I need to move on. I think my subconscience is trying to tell me that it's over, and i need to move forward with my life. My heart needs to accept what my mind already knows. It has been months, and I'm tired of thinking about him.


On a lighter note, I met someone who seems wonderful. His name is Joe, and he'd super sweet, intelligent, he has aantastic sense of humor. I've been alone since the split, and it's so refreshing to have a conversation with a man who isn't interested in bringing me down, or fighting. I could see myself getting to know him and forming a friendship that could have the potential to evolve into more. Whatever happens, I want to take things very slowly and see what, if anything, comes of it.


In any event, I'm focusing mainly on me for now. That may seem selfish, but it's what I need to do. I'm feeling very ambitious as of late. I've undertaken the project of redecorating my room, and last night, I painted my dresser. It was a long process that included sanding, sealing, painting, and sponging, but I am so glad I did it. It looks amazing! It's hard to believe that something this cool was the fruits of my labor. I've never one anything handy like this before, but having done it, i feel like I can do anything (Within reason of course. Lol). We'll see what task I'll tackle next. ;D

(drive a nail in)

[01 Sep 2005|04:21am]
[ mood | cynical ]
[ music | Pretty Girl - SugarCult ]

Long time, eh? It seems as though I start all of my entries that way. I suppose I could update more frequently, but I don't really see a point. Nobody reads this thing anyway. It is but an outlet for me, a proverbial wasteland for my expired thoughts and what not. Kinda bleak.

Whatever.

Good news:
I bought a red 95 Grand Am SE. The windows are tinted, and I like it a lot.
Nicole and I are taking a CNA course beginning in September (This Month!), which will hopefully provide an escape from my dead end lifestyle. I'll be making at least double what I am now. News just doesn't get much better than that. I'm looking forward to the change.

Bad news:
Mike and I broke up. I guess, being as I haven't made mention of him much in this thing, that wouldn't seem like a big deal, but it was. I spent eight months devoting myself to him, and then nothing. Men are ridiculous. I've spent time with a few men since the split, but sadly, those encounters too would fall under the 'bad news' category.


You win some, you lose some I guess. Damnit, I'm waiting on my lucky streak.

(drive a nail in)

[20 Jan 2005|09:36am]
[ mood | awake ]
[ music | The Shins - Kissing the lipless ]

I haven't posted in awhile, but I have some free time, so what the hell. :]

I came to Nicole and Carly's house almost a week ago, and we've been having a blast. I'm surprised that I've stayed this long. We always plan on me staying for a night, MAYBE two or three, but this time I stayed like six or something. Going home will feel strange. This was like a mini vacation kinda. Lol. It's really cool here though. They used to live across the street from me when I was young as hell, so I've known them for a long time. They always make me feel like a part of the family, but I like to think that I kind of am. :)

Nicole's baby is getting so big! She's soooo pretty. And she's smart! It's so strange to think that she's a tiny little person and will be molded by whatever those around her say and do. Ok, so it's not that hard to imagine, because that's obviously what a baby is... but it's cool because in a little way, me being around while she's developing and learning all these new things is cool. It's like.. because I'm in her life, even if only a little bit, I get to help mold her. :) I can't wait to have a baby. 2007 sounds like a good year. Lol. I just hope he or she is as cute as Maddie! She's s'damn cute. Haha. God knows she must have gotten it from Nicole! Haha

Anyway, I'm getting a new cell within the next week, so that rocks. Mike is getting it for me. He's great. I really like him a lot. :] I'll post about him some other time if I feel like it. Right now, I'm gonna go cuz Nicole and I have things to do. We're gonna go to the tech and get information about classes so we won't be bums. Lol. Then we're gonna go pick up carly and go have lunch. It's always fun when we all get together. It'll be an eventful day, I'm sure. And today I'm going home, no matter how much fun we have! I miss my mom. Isn't that gay? haha. Whatever though, I do. ;x

Yeah, and my background is effed. That blows. I gotta fix that...someday when i'm not a lazy ass. Haha.

Peace, kids. ;]

(drive a nail in)

[11 Oct 2004|03:56am]
[ mood | tired ]

Would anyone want to bang you? by phobia
Name:
Favorite Food:
Wants to Bang you:
This many times:181
Quiz created with MemeGen!


Yep, so that's cool. I love Johnny Depp! IT IS YOU, ICHABOD CRANE!


Today was Madelyn's first birthday party. It started at 1, but unfortunately, I slept until about 1:30, then had to get ready AND go all the way out by the mall to get a card and shit. By the time I did all the shit I had to do, it was already like 4 something. I ended up getting there at like five-ish... so that sucks. But if you know me at all, you know that I'm never on time. Never. I should work on that or something. Lol. Iunno. Whatever.

Far-Left Liberal
Where do you fall on the liberal - conservative political spectrum? (United States)

brought to you by Quizilla

Can't we all just get a bong? (lololol, that was old skool.)


After I stopped in at Maddie's party, I called Chad and we chilled for awhile.Then Melissa called me so I met her at her house. We just chilled all night and shit. OMG I wanted an empanada SO bad, but by the time I thought about it, Taco Bell was closed. So we went to Walmart and tried to find some, cuz yanno, what the fuck doesn't Walmart have?

Empanadas!


The dumbass workers didn't even know what an empanada was. I was like wtf retards... I understand that you work the freaks/geeks shift, but come on, have you never been to Taco Bell? Dumb-da-dumb-dumb. I hate people sometimes. But I love Melissa. We had a shitload of fun.

Take the quiz: "What Kinda Kiss R U?"

Playful Kiss
The playful kiss is about you having fun and not needing to have feelings for that person. You just go with the flow!

Quizzes are neato.

Take the quiz: "What Kind of Pervert are You?"

The Seductive Pervert
The Seductive Pervert: You are The Seductive Pervert, you don't have to try! You use only your body and sexual ways to lure someone in an endless dream of sexual fantasies. Although you may use toys, you have your desires, you seem to know what gets to them, you even know their soft spots, woah, wouldn't matter if they had first met you or not! Your ways are unbelievable and quite sensual, you could probably lay anyone you wanted with the way you speak, move, or just motion. Just don't test your abilities on yourself, you might find yourself attracted to even your own body. Let's try attracting another person instead. Hehe!

Take the quiz: "Which God or Goddess are you?"

God of Darkness
Seductive and, whether it's ture or not, HOT! You don't mind using what you got to take advantage of people, and you know you got it. You don't care what people think of you and wear your sexual orientation on your sleeve. You are the second piece to the ultimate divine being, combining darkeness with light makes the world live.

WTF kinda anime shit is that? I hate anime. That picture is kinda cool though, I s'pose.





How random are you?

this quiz was made by alanna



That quiz is bogus! I'm way random, mother fucker. Lol, I posted it anyway so you could all go take it. The retard who wrote it has an unhealthy fixation with bananas, though. Iunno what all that's about, but who am i to judge another man's relationship with his fruit?

Girly Mama 2
You're a girl power mommy! You love to be girly,
but you're no pushover. Your kids are learning
that gender differences don't have to mean
gender inequality. You've taken back pink, and
you don't care who knows it!


What kind of a freaky mother are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

W T F



You Know You're From Wisconsin When...


You can taste a difference in cheese made somewhere else

You own at least one tie with a or peice of jewelry with a Green Bay Packer theme

You can find and pronounce : Eau Claire, Oconomowoc, Menomonee Falls, Waukesha, and La Crosse, Fond du Lac.

You can correctly spell Milwaukee.

You know what "bubbler" means.

At least one of your family members works / worked in a cheese factory.

A holstein cow outside of Wisconsin makes you miss home.

You can taste the difference between apples grown up north and the ones that you can buy in the south.

When talking about the Green Bay Packers you refer to them as "we".

When the weather hits 0 degrees you decide that maybe it's time to get out a jacket instead of a sweatshirt.

The family gets together every week for fish fry at the local pub.

You know what a brat is, and they're at every outdoor event that your family has ever had.

You know how to make a very good sled out of normal household items.

Your love you outdoor pool because of how it doubles as an ice skating area during the winter.

You can tell the difference between the smell of cow manure and pig manure.

You have watched Fargo and not noticed an accent.

You drive around with the air conditioning on until it hits 30 degrees, because it just was so darn hot outside.

The local paper needs 6 pages to cover the Packers... in July!

Your best shirt has a big letter G on it.

You've said "Of course they'll win. They're God's team."

You think it's nice enough to swim when the temperature hits 50.

You family owns a "winter car" while the "good one" sits in the garage from Nov-Apr.

Your put ketchup on a charcoal grilled NY strip steak.

You live in a house that has no front steps, yet the door is one yard above the ground.

You think everyone from south of Madison has an accent.

You can identify a Michigan accent.

Down South to you means Chicago.

Traveling coast to coast means going from Superior to Milwaukee.

You can make sense out of the words "upnort" and "Trivers".

You have to go to Florida to get a tan in August.

You consider Madison exotic.

You can visit Luxemburg, Holland, Belgium, Denmark, Berlin, New London & Poland all in one afternoon.

You can recognize someone from Illinois from their driving.

You buy cat litter every winter, but you don't own a cat.

At least twice a year, the kitchen doubles as a meat processing plant or cannery.

You know what to do with a Blatz.

You don't have a coughing fit from one sip of Pabst Blue Ribbon.

Bucky the Badger hangs on your Christmas tree even if you didn't go to University of Wisconsinm Madison.

You're a member of the Polar Bear Club and proud of it.

You can use the word "ya der hey" easily in a sentence

You hear someone use the words "uff-dah" and you don't immediately break into uncontrollable laughter.

Your whole family wears green and gold to church on Sunday.

Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a cow next to your blue spruce.

You know how to polka

You own a cheesehead

You have cow pharaphenilia around your house, including your pajama pants

You know what a FIB is and can spot them a mile away.

You think of the major four food groups as cheese, beer, brats and Jell-O salad with marshmallows.

FFA was the most popular club in high school

You have eaten a cow pie at the State Fair.

There was at least one kid in your class who had to help milk cows in the morning

Country Kitchen is the place to meet after the party

You have ever seen or played in a "broom ball" game.

You have ever partied at Summerfest, Festa Italiana, German Fest, Irish Fest, Oktoberfest, or all of the above.

You or someone you know was a "Dairy Princess" at a county fair.

You can't be friends with a Vikings fan

Your idea of diversity is having black, white, and brown cows.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Wisconsin.






That was so absurd, it geeked me hella.


HASH(0x8aa5450)
Mermaid - mermaids are gorgeous, lovely and
alluringly innocent, but there is more to them
than that. Mermaids tend to 'move in packs',
sticking to those they know and rarely breaking
out of their friendship circles. They are very
loyal to their friends, but do not care as much
for others outside their group. Mermaids are
clever in ways outside of academics, they know
how to get what they want in life and how to
use what they've been given to its full
potential. You are a crafty bunch with layers
of loveliness, mermaids are great!


Personality thingy type(detailed, with pics (wow i know) and most likely for girls)
brought to you by Quizilla

I'm a water sign, but damn. Lol


Bunny Love!
You are into the "love revolution" scene
thus you are a "love revolution"
blinkie! Easy enough.


What blinkie are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Ok, these quizzes keep getting gayer and gayer [PRIDE! what what!]so I'm done clogging your journals now. I woulda added the little link thinger in there to hide the shit, but it's like 5 AM and i'm tired. So fuck it, i'm going to bed.

OH yeah, I bought new jeans. They make my ass look hella good. I rock.

(drive a nail in)

[06 Oct 2004|12:28am]
[ mood | blah ]
[ music | Shinedown - 45 ]

Minutes are hours, hours are days.
Trapped in the nothingness of my very being.
Watch me fall apart.
If you can't duck it, fuck it.
fuck me.

;]

(drive a nail in)

[04 Oct 2004|12:40am]
[ mood | dorky ]
[ music | The Killers - Somebody told me ]

Yep, so life is cool. I got my license reinstated the other day, and that rocks.


Joe asked me to go to Seattle with him at the end of the month. I really might go... all inclusive trip, there isn't really any down side. ;D


I just smacked Brittany... what what! Now she's my prison bitch. lololol <3


Shit, I thought I had more to say. Lol. Whatever.


Call me if you're cool. What what. ;]

(drive a nail in)

lololol [04 Oct 2004|12:39am]
My LiveJournal Trick-or-Treat Haul
my_crucifixion goes trick-or-treating, dressed up as Baby Spice with hooker tendencies.
burgundyphoenix tricks you! You get a rotten egg.
cheatrulesfoamy gives you 18 white peach-flavoured pieces of bubblegum.
digitalfaery tricks you! You lose 6 pieces of candy!
ladyfiara gives you 8 yellow coconut-flavoured pieces of chewing gum.
meganr123 tricks you! You get a scratched CD.
sxeboi2k3 tricks you! You get a wad of paper.
the_smoker tricks you! You lose 16 pieces of candy!
my_crucifixion ends up with 4 pieces of candy, a rotten egg, a scratched CD, and a wad of paper.
Go trick-or-treating! Username:
Another fun meme brought to you by rfreebern.

(drive a nail in)

[04 Oct 2004|12:27am]
Take the quiz: "What Kind of Soul Do You Retain?"

Forgotten
Somewhere, early on, you lost a sense of your soul. Even reading this, you may not understand. You lost a very precious part of you and silently, it yearns to be back with you.



W
T
F


lolol

(drive a nail in)

[22 Sep 2004|10:00am]
How it feels

(drive a nail in)

[22 Sep 2004|09:40am]
It's been awhile, but I'm at school and I'm bored so I thought I'd post. We're doing projects on "self-esteem." Haha. Exciting, huh? What what! Earlier, I had to do an essay on a pamphlet entitled, "I am important!" I tell ya, they make us do some weird shit here. Whatever though, I'm done on Friday. Thank God for that. I can sleep again! Haha. Yep, and I got a job finally. That won't interfere with my sleeping though. The hours rock. Score. I work 4-9 on week days, and 9-3 on Saturdays. The Saturday shift kinda blows, but I'll cope. My place of employment is Fox Valley Distributing. I'm a telemarketer! Haha! It's not that bad. I kinda like it. And the people with whom I work are really cool. I think things will work out. :] Time will tell, eh?

ok, so, it's weird.. Brittany got a job too. Neither of us had a job for the longest time, and then suddenly, in the same week, we both got one. Kinda strange, eh? Cool though. Go us, what what!


On a less positive note, men suck. Wtf, man, I rock. Don't pull this bastard ass man routine with me! It will -so- not fly. ;x !

Don't diss me, I'll cry! lololol

(drive a nail in)

Brittany Galore! [16 Sep 2004|09:38pm]
[ mood | blah ]
[ music | Seether ft. Amy Lee - Broken ]

And you know why? Because that's me! LOL I'm updating for my lovely sex partner Mandy ^.^
"Cuz I'm too fuckin' lazy to do it myself."
We've decided to diet... not going to great for either of us at the moment... but shit happens and we'll get into the routine hopefully.
Blah blah blah Call Mandy, Cuz she's hot!

So... Brian. She talked to him on the phone for like... 8 or 9 hours a few nights ago and I guess they got to know each other severely well. ^.^ "I miss him so much!" She's totally diggin' on him. (Woa... never used those words before >.<) "At least you didn't say I'm crunchin on him." LMAO He's tall, skinny, curly kinda long dark brown hair. "I like him a bunch and I don't know why. He has a great laugh." We met up with him at the mall for a brief moment while we were chillin' outside because punks wouldn't let us in to see Ryan Cabrera.

"I wanted to know, I love the way you laugh..."

(drive a nail in)

[09 Sep 2004|04:58pm]
I had a dumbass appointment thing today with a career counselor. That was a real shit-fest. After that, I got some new bras and underpants. What what! Hell yeah, i'm sexy like whoa. Haha. Nothing else is really new.. i'unno. Chilled with Bubs and Brittany the past few days. Had fun. Whatever, same ol'. Oh, and Brittany's friend Brian seems cool. We're gonna hang out sometime in the near future. Chinese food and Pretty Woman... it's a date! ;D

S'all for now. P'z, muthaz. lolol

(drive a nail in)

[27 Aug 2004|05:39pm]
(Some weird old guy is sitting next to me, reading whatever dumbass shit is on his screen out loud.. under his breath sort of, but it's weirding me out. Stupid freaks that come here, I tell ya! Oh, and some other old guy stared at my boobs earlier. Rofl. I can't wait to get the fuck out of here.)



BRITTANY AND I ARE GOING SWIMMING TONIGHT! WHAT WHAT! We've been wanting to go for like weeks, so i'm psyched. Lol.


K, now I'm going f'real. haha. Peace out. And madd love to all my Life-D homies! I miss you tons! Hit me up on the aim sometime... submodaiitiez. Or yahoo... s4pph0. Contact me or die! ;D

(2 nails | drive a nail in)

[27 Aug 2004|05:22pm]
My mom wanted to come check out a book at the library, so I siezed the opportunity to come update. Here's my life in a nutshell as of late:


cherry pie!
I am Cherry Pie!!!
Hot and sexy! I like to be in style and love to
look my best. I love attention and try too hard
to get it! I'm pretty flirtatious, i'm a really
fun person to hang around even though i get
muself into trouble sometimes!


Which kind of desert are you?
brought to you by Quizilla


Rainbow
Rainbow


?? Which Natural Wonder Or Disaster Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla


I haven't posted at all lately because the internet at my house is down. Luke and my mom are breaking up and the phone was in his name, so of course the fucker disconnected it. I'd rather go without a phone/internet connection than continue living with that monster of a man. I loathe him. He'll be out by October 1st. Thank God. It's about mother fucking time my mom came to her senses and kicked that raunchy asshole to the curb. I know that with him gone, things will start to look up for us. I'm going to get a job and so is she, after her surgery. We'll make it, and we'll be doing better than we were with him around. What really rocks is that my mom will feel better about herself. There won't be anyone around to bring her down anymore. She deerves to be happy, and I know she will be once everything pans out. Obviously I can't move out yet, though. That kinda foils my plans for the immediate future. I'll hafta be helping her with Emily, and bills and what not. I'm not complaining though. Once we're back on our feet I'll be able to move. This will give me a chance to save up some money anyway which is always a good idea.

Though I haven't posted in awhile, I am still online sometimes at Brittany's house. She just moved like a block away from me and we've been hanging out a lot lately. I'm really happy that she moved so close, cuz we've been having a blast together. Plus it's like doubling our wardrobe! hahahaha, jk. Our styles are waaaay different. ;D

Speaking of styles, I went thrifting yesterday and got the coolest shit ever. I'm wearing some of my cool new vintage shit today, actually. I kinda look like a skank cuz I have massive cleavage exposed, but yanno what? I could care less. I look hot as hell and i know it. lol. WHAT WHAT! HOLLA!


And Rob, you rat tail, I've been trying to get ahold of you! You suck and blow simultaneously! Skank pot! <333


Aight, with that said, I'm out. ;]

(drive a nail in)

[04 Aug 2004|07:05pm]
Sean, a friend from high school, and I went out for lunch today and caught up. It was a lot of fun. I adore him<33 We go way back. Then we watched a movie and had a grand ol' time. Hopefully tonight I'll chill with Jordan [And hot Tom and hot Amber]. hehe. I'unno. Whatever y0. My nose rocks.

(1 nail | drive a nail in)

[04 Aug 2004|04:42am]
We got trashed and pierced my nose and my lip tonight. Rock out. It hurts, but it'll be worth it. I can't wait till it heals. I love Jordan and Tom<33

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